Monday, 19 March 2012

Minnie Moo tastes delicious!

Through the pecked holes I could see six eyes staring at me and I couldn’t help but do a little happy dance on the inside, boy oh boy our buffet table would soon be groaning under the weight of little ones. Looking around I did a quick count; two cats and one rabbit under the box I’m standing on plus with a couple of anipals under all the other boxes, we'll be feasting for days! It was like Easter, Christmas and my birthday all rolled into one. All I had to do was come up with a plan to entice those tasty morsels out. Putting my smart thinking cap on after a few moments I knew exactly what to do. Treat them like woolly sheep; tempt one out and the rest would follow. Staring right back at the three pairs of eyes I thought I’m going to start with you lot.

While Mr Hawk was doing his inside happy dance Minnie Moo was doing a sad little two step as he knew his time had come to be a brave cat not only in words but in actions. So many from Little Village were depending on him fueled by this and with a steely determination in his eye he turned to Mayor Thumper and Mr T to whisper, "it’s not going to be easy but we will win! Let’s lie low and wait for him to make the first move." Both nodded in silent agreement.

Right on cue and dripping in a syrup sweet honey Mr Hawk’s sugar coated voice dribbled through the box “Hello my visitor welcome to the trunk of my home, the 3rd tree on the left. I must apologise for my pecking madness and damaging your box I'm a little over-protective of my young family it was done to ensure they'd come to no harm. I'm sure you understand and, don’t worry about the mess I can easily cover the holes later with a little duct-tape."

Sounding like a slice of warm, sweet nice as pie yet every single word I spoke was just a big whopper; a giant lie told to create a false sense of security in the hope that eventually one or all would feel reassured and safe enough to venture out into the dangerous clasp of my claws. I couldn’t wait to see them quiver with fright and the knowledge their destiny lay in the upside down part of my claw.

Not being able to resist I sweetly added "now you must all be very hot, hungry and thirsty. Why not come out and I’ll prepare some food for you and get you all something to drink? Besides it really is way to nice to spend the day indoors, or in your case under a box." After jumping down from the top I even managed, for sound effect, to rustle a few leaves together and for a moment I was fooled to believe I was opening a box of crackers.

Letting the leaves fall I heard a voice say "Thank you for such a warm introduction it’s most unexpected especially after the pecking fiasco we really thought you’d lost your mind. But we understand your reasoning and accept your apology. You’re absolutely right we’re parched for thirst and are so hungry the mere mention of food has us drooling."

All I could see was a vision of the buffet table overweight from top to toe with layer upon layer of tasty little ones.

Rudely interrupted the voice under the box continued, "But I don’t think you know who we are, I’m Minnie Moo the group's Fearless Leader and with me is Thumper, Mayor of Little Village and the awesome Mr T who needs no introduction. Underneath all the other boxes are the Little Village anipals who are all under strict instructions not to do anything unless I give the order. We might be extremely cute but we’re definitely not stupid, you’re just putting on the I’m really a nice Hawk routine, but you can’t fool us, we know the truth you’re just a mean-as Hawk who sees us all as tempting dishes for your buffet table."

Following a tense moment of silence a round of apawse broke out as the anipals stomped their paws in approval.

Feeling confident I went on, "we’re here today because we want Little Village restored to it’s former glory, a village where everyone lived in peace and harmony and not under the constant fear of being nothing more than a dish waiting to be swooped upon. We want you and all the other Hawks to be more inclusive rather than aggressive and exclusive that way we can all live happily together and share our community. All we're asking is that you have a change of cattitude".

As the King of the Hawks nobody had ever dared speak to me like that and my inside happy dance changed to a repeated flap of wing fury. "So Minnie Moo you must be one brave cat to even think you can talk to me let alone tell me I need a new cattitude. But as you say in the spirit of trying not to get too angry I’ll be cordial to say as sweet as it sounds its not going to happen, you of all cats should know we’ve been eating little anipals for millions of years after-all I’m from the dinosaur family we're not known for our pleasantries or for trying to be cute and cuddly we’ve got a mean streak, even the vegetarians in the family can be a little hard to handle."

Well Mr Hawk I’m not here to pluck any leaves from your family tree but you should know all birds are from the dinosaurs not just the mean ones. Even the pretty blue budgie “Bluey” who lives four doors down from me is somehow related to you. Anyway family history is no excuse to be mean and terrifying besides we’ll always make sure you have enough to eat. I can’t remember a day when any of us anipals went hungry.

So getting back to the spirit of living in peace and harmony we want to invite you, your family and, all the Hawks to our local village fête, a party tomorrow night held at the village green. You’re all welcome but only if you all embrace our community spirit and stop seeing us as your free food ticket."

Little did Mr Hawk know that a few minutes earlier Mrs Hawk and her little feathery baby birds had all poked their heads up and out of the nest to see what the commotion was all about and they all had a birds-eye view of the action. Mrs Hawk looked most concerned.

"Oh really Minnie Moo so you expect me to change just like that, ok that’s just fine, now here's a plan why don’t you invite me again but this time tell it to my face, let’s do this like real Hawks do or do you always need a box to protect you"?

Minnie Moo whispered to Mayor Thumper and Mr T, "I’m going out, don’t worry I’ll be brave. If he attacks me stay put and send the command for everyone else not to come out. I don’t want anyone to get hurt. Besides I’m ready to face my hawk-o-phobia", and without saying a word and wearing nothing more than a brave heart he left the box.

Face to face with Mr Hawk, Minnie Moo took a few steps closer before going to sit down. "Not so fast, how do you know I’m not going to eat you all up. If you listen hard enough you can hear my tummy grumbling. For you that's a double-edged sword to fall on one end's angry the other hungry. It’s not looking good for you Minnie Moo let's just say it’s just a pity you didn’t bring along the salt and pepper."

Staring directly into those hawkish eyes I tried to fake a - look at me I"m having one last thought look - the thought went something like this..I just can’t deny it Mr Hawk does hold my destiny in his claw. With my diet of friskies, pet milk and special treats from the Pussy Foot Inn I'm destined to be the star of the buffet table. Or, was it that Mrs Hawk who would soon tell him of his destiny?

Yours in never to be seen on the buffet table friskies Minnie Moo
Read here for more tails thank you!

No comments:

Post a Comment

It's Minnie Moo here, I love your comments as much as I love Friskies!